I find it strange how time goes by so quickly, to the point where memories become foggy blurs. Time is man made, after all.
At the end of 2011, I made only two "New Year's Resolutions" for 2012. The first was to finalize my career path, and the second, to keep up a healthier lifestyle.
There were a lot of ups and downs that came with the latter, a large portion of those being particularly negative but I suppose I kind of made it through them.
I started 2012 as being strictly vegetarian, working out 15-20 hours a week, counting calories (300-400 daily max) and sleeping regularly (hour-wise) but unfortunately still not sleeping enough. This carried on through early April, when my hair started falling out and my iron deficiency anemia got really out of hand. The sudden realization of the damage I had done hit me like a brick, and while I fell through several pants/shirts/dress sizes, I really regretted my choices. I had a stint of obsessive dieting back in high school, but it never became this bad from what I can recall.
Luckily, I caught myself before doing further damage. While I am proud of my success, I wouldn't recommend that kind of lifestyle to anyone. It was a bad place filled with severe emptiness and self-hatred.
All in all, I lost 38 pounds (17 kg) this year and have managed to keep it off. I'm still not confident enough in my appearance to show before and after photos, and I do not believe I will be for at least another year.
I eat much cleaner (organic, non-processed, super foods, fruits & veggies) & exercise almost daily now, and I hope to keep this up for 2013 as well.
After much introspection and despite my passionate hatred for school and "the man," I'm starting classes again for my BA in fine arts. I lack determination and motivation, as well as technical skill but I can't get the art out of my life. I don't want to put all my hopes into this but I feel it is a necessary evil to move my mind and my life out of the current slump.
I told myself to not hole up with my feelings this year, too. Consequently, I had my heart broken several times after putting myself out there. I would like to believe that everything is a learning experience which further builds character, but even still... it's best not to focus on unnecessary things such as these.
My goals for 2013 are fairly realistic, some a bit harder to do than others in comparison but I've got to press on, right?
- eat healthy & stay active
- draw every day
- read at least 2 books a month
- love & live fearlessly
- travel more & visit faraway friends
- make a new friend
- do good in school
- start tattoo piece
It's been taking a while, but the new blog design should be up for the start of 2013 (Central Time). Please look forward to it! I'll also be integrating Disqus (FINALLY LOL) so I can reply to comments and have you properly notified when you come to me with questions.
The biggest thanks for those of you who have lent kind words and read this useless blog.
I hope you all have a Happy New Year!